Death of a Friend
Posted on February 27, 2012
I want to share something very personal with my blogging family here that occurred late last month.
In the wee hours of January 23, 2012, I lost not just a friend, but my best friend and the love of my life. We were married over 28 years and have two beautiful grown girls. We had the type of marriage where we could be together 24 hours a day and it not be enough. We had our occasional quarrels, but mostly we simply enjoyed spending time together.
He had an infectious laugh and the best sense of humor. Not only was he handsome, but he was one of the most brilliant men I’ve ever known. 
In regards to his health, Willie had a couple of diseases that disabled him, but not to the point of causing his death. It was a surprise and devastation for me and our girls.
We did not know for three weeks after he died — until the toxicology report came back — what he died from. Although he had one artery going into the heart that was 80% blocked near the entrance to the heart, the coroner ruled that it was an accidental overdose of Fentanyl.
Like many sufferers of advanced interstitial cystitis (a serious debilitating bladder condition), Willie used a Fentanyl patch for pain relief, among other oral prescription pain killers. Fentanyl is the same drug terminal cancer sufferers use to help manage pain while awaiting death.
Apparently, the patch leaked allowing a high toxicity level of the drug into his bloodstream and that is what caused his demise … and our great loss. The patch used to have issues like this, but was taken off the market for a while to correct the issue. It appears there may still be a problem with it.
For the first four-and-a-half weeks after his death, I could do nothing but cry every day and wish he’d taken me with him. I accepted a brick-and-mortar job in early July of last year, because my writing jobs were not paying enough. I was working evenings until just this week when I go to days, so I was not even there when he passed away.
My girls and I still question why, but are working hard at finding our new “normal,” whatever that is. Friends and family are doing their best to help that along. I couldn’t ask for a stronger support system at home and at work, and I’ve always been able to count on our blogging membership here for support. Please know that you can count on me, too.
To combat the grief, I’m keeping myself busy with activities and cultivating relationships I did not have time for before. It helps pass the time and I think it will help the healing process along.
It is now that I need my blogging community more than ever. I need your prayers and support to get us through this. I need your friendships to continue and will definitely stay in touch and keep you updated if you are interested. If you need something from me for which I can assist, please don’t hesitate to ask.
I want you to know that if I will help if I can.
Thank you for all your wonderful support and encouragement in the past, and I look forward to continued relationships going forward.
To all of you — God bless!
Writing 4 Effect 
Ossy
February 27, 2012
oh! this is very touching, Let God give you the strength to go through all these with your girls, it is well.
jant1951
February 27, 2012
My deepest sympathy to you and your girls. May God give you the strength to make it through each and every day.
smanaher
February 27, 2012
Sherry, I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Praying for God’s peace and presence to aid you during this very difficult time. If you need anything, please let me know. God Bless! Shawn
Brenda McCreight
February 27, 2012
I am so sorry for your loss – I greatly appreciate that you took the time to warn about this drug. My prayers are with you and your daughters.
claudiajustsaying
February 27, 2012
Sherry,
My deepest sympathy. You and yours will be in my prayers. I appreciate your sharing the details of his passing that had to be extremely hard on you.
Writing4Effect
February 27, 2012
Thank you so much for your kind words, condolences and prayers. They mean so much to me. Now that I have more time, I have plans to post weekly … I think it’ll therapeutic for me and, hopefully, be informative for our blogging audience here. Thank you, again. ❤
Zarine
February 27, 2012
So sorry to hear about it.
cspeno
March 4, 2012
Sherry
Thank you for this poignant post. I’ve thought of you often since I’ve learned of your loss a few weeks ago. I’m not sure what prompted me to email you then, but I am sure it was some mental connection that we have as writers. Now, as then, you have my deepest sympathy. As one who has been there, please know I am only a phone call away for support and understanding.We always kept in touch through our blogs since we “met” last year, and you’ve been missed; I look forward to see you back online with all of your friends in blogging. Take care…
Penelope J.
March 5, 2012
Sherry, your evocative post about Willie and your unique relationship made my eyes mist over. Thanks also for sharing the reasons leading up to his death. (Shocking and unbelievable that the Fentanyl patch is on the market). When I heard the news a few weeks ago, I also emailed you, but that seemed small and inconclusive.
It must have been extremely painful for you to write about his passing, but a writer, it must have answered a need inside you, and it was a moving portrayal of a wonderful husband, a great friend, and a close relationship
As someone who has come to know you (through our mutual blogging) and regard you as a friend, you can count on my support and friendship in the future. My thoughts are with you.
. .
Writing4Effect
March 5, 2012
Oh, Penny, I am so sorry I did not reply to your email. So much was going on, I don’t even remember receiving it, but will definitely look for it. Thank you for your friendship, too. I enjoy it very much, because we hit it off at the onset. We’ve supported each other from the very time we first virtually met. I think us middle-aged ladies need to stick together, and you’ve always been such a strong supporter. I am very grateful for you.
Harriette
March 12, 2012
Sherry,
My deepest condolences – you and your girls will be in my prayers.
Writing4Effect
March 12, 2012
Hi, Harriette. We greatly appreciate that.
Samantha Bangayan
March 25, 2012
Sherry, I’m so, so sorry again for your loss. I don’t know how you always do it, but you have such a way with words that this post brought tears to my eyes as you commemorated your late husband. Thank you for the reminder that life is so short and for showing me what human strength really means when the heart can overcome even the most tragic of events. I hope you know that you can continue to count on me. Sending warm, warm hugs your way.
Writing4Effect
April 1, 2012
Thank you, Sam, you’re a good friend. You’re always an encouragement, never have a bad thing to say about anybody and always have something good to say about everybody. By the way, I receive all those warm, warm hugs. 😉
Writing4Effect
February 16, 2013
Thank you. It’s been a year and it still sometimes feel very fresh, but I understand that’s common. Of course, hearing from readers like you is always encouraging.
Sherry